The aim of writing The Virginia Governess was that when a person read it, the first thing that came into their mind should be the daily life of women of the Civil War South. We often hear about the battles and heroics of generals, but we rarely read about the countless women, wives, mothers, sisters, and daughters who fought their own war.
The truth is, these women’s experiences were multifaceted: full of strength, sacrifice, and distress, as well as their untiring resilience. They did not fight on the battlefield, but in fact, they were in the very trenches of survival.
Women as Keepers of the Homefront
For women like Charlotte “Lottie” Briggs, my heroine, war meant entering duties they had never expected to carry. The men of the family were in the field now fighting, and as soon as the invitations began to arrive, the women went into action, running a household, teaching children, writing, supervising the farms, and stretching the scant stores to feed the entire family.
That was the reality. Just imagine having to worry about whether or not your crops were going to make it, how to barter for fabric to sew clothes from, and what you were going to do as salt, a simple kitchen staple, became scarce. It was the home front that really suffered shortages. Women turned resourceful out of sheer necessity.
They learned to make coffee from parched corn, dye fabric from plants, and repurpose every scrap of material they could find. It wasn’t glamorous. It was survival.
The Emotional Burden of Waiting
Perhaps the hardest part of women’s lives, though, was the waiting. Imagine not knowing if your husband, fiancé, or brother would ever come home. Letters were slow, often intercepted, and sometimes never arrived at all. Each knock at the door could mean news of a death.
I wove this uncertainty into Lottie’s story because it was the constant backdrop for so many Southern women. Even in moments of laughter, sewing circles, or church gatherings, there was always the silent question: Who will we lose next?
Governesses, Teachers, and Caretakers
Another reality you’ll see women facing in the South was the necessity of work. For some, like Lottie, that meant taking positions as governesses. Also, you’ll see stories of families with children still needing education, even in wartime. So, governesses became anchors for households, teaching reading, arithmetic, geography, and even Latin, while also becoming role models for children navigating the uncertainty of war.
Not just as governesses, they also took on the role of nurses who went to the frontline, taking care of the injured soldiers and occasionally treating them in temporary hospitals. Some would keep stitching clothes for the men or hoarding supplies. And, undoubtedly, the African slave women bore the maximum weight, doing the work that kept the plantations functioning, providing food for families most of the time, with hopes of freedom for themselves.
Small Joys and Stubborn Hope
Life brought up frail hopes, but amid all these challenges, women could create little joys. They would quilt bees, meet in hastily assembled tea parties (sometimes using sassafras or rose hips instead of true tea), and lean on one another for support.
I believe that what strikes one as the most amazing thing about women in the Civil War South is the fact that they could keep even a scintilla of hope alive. Though food was scarce and their clothes very ragged, and hearts were heavy with what had been lost, yet these women always found time to laugh, to sing hymns in praise of their Lord, and to write letters brimming with love.
Why These Stories Matter
This question, “What was life really like for women in the Civil War South?” isn’t simple to answer. It was really hard, exhausting, and full of heartache. And yet, it was also a time that revealed extraordinary strength, as seen in women like Lottie.
These women were not only bystanders, they really were survivors. They indeed kept the homes intact, raised children, nursed the wounded, and carried communities during the war. Their sacrifice is huge, though not always recorded in history.
In writing The Virginia Governess, I wanted to honor these women, not just fictional Lottie but also all the real, unnamed women whom she represented. Her resilience, endurance, and love remind us that sometimes, even in these days of scarcity and fear, you can keep moving forward.
